Oh dear Lord. Will you look at this thing.
Imagine owning it. Even worse: Imagine being seen with it. It’s too horrifying to contemplate.
Is it supposed to hang from your belt or what? That would be monumentally stupid. Surely you’re asking for that knife-and-a-moped, cutting-the-strap trick that thieves perfected for hand bags.
Actually, maybe its in-built protection from that method of theft is its hideous, hideous appearance.
Is this, or is this not, you’re nan’s purse from 1984?
I could be wrong, but that pattern looks distinctly familiar. Either way, it’s certainly a bit dated-looking for something like the iPod Video - a contraption so painfully cool that owning one’s like repeatedly stabbing yourself through the eyes with an icicle.
Maybe this look’s so old it’s cool again. I’m never good with stuff like that. Everything I own is bought as uncool and subsequently abandoned before it becomes cool again.
It’s not especially clever to mock text that is clearly translated from another language, but I’m not clever. Conico’s website features the following text about the ZS35 iPod wallet:
“Elegant attribute. Tailor makes ipod video case for the high bow serious with shiny Spanish Nappa genuine leather.”
Brown and leathery. Like a cow.
No. Not like a cow. Like a dead cow’s skin - desecrated for the embellishment of some no-mark’s ‘look’.
It’s just a brown leather thing. I don’t know why I’m being so hateful about it. I used to wear a suede jacket once for God’s sake, back when I was young enough to wear outer garments which weren’t necessarily waterproof.
Maybe it’s because it’s designed specifically to hold an iPod Video - one of the most vacuous products imaginable. I shouldn’t take it out on the case really, but if products were in teams, this case would be on the iPod Video’s team. Stupid thing. Stupid team.
It’s a case for Creative’s Zen Vision:M. Conico say it’s brown on their website. It’s clearly yellow.
There’s no international definition of the various colours. It’s because colour’s a continuum rather than being made up of discrete, identifiable units.
Women tend to identify more colours than men, for example. Women have colours like ‘mauve’, ‘eggshell’ and ‘purple’. Weird stuff like that. Men just have red, green, blue and yellow. So a woman might differentiate between red and scarlet, whereas for a man, both would be red.
Either way, I think we can all agree that this case is yellow and not brown.
The first thing that strikes me about the ‘Tune In Wallet’ is obviously the name. I think it’s a play on words that hasn’t quite worked. It sounds a bit like caveman English.
The second thing that I notice is that the ‘intricate pattern detail’ is on the inside. Why is it on the inside? Surely, if your case is open, you’re doing stuff with the iPod itself. You’re not gazing lovingly at the inside of the case. I can understand that the outside might not get much of an airing, because ordinarily it would be in your pocket, but the inside?
I wonder how much of a part the ‘intricate pattern detail’ played in making the price of this product roughly equivalent to a less branded MP3 player. You’ll notice that I don’t include the price, which is because we’re all from different countries. Maybe the Tune In Wallet’s cheap in your country. I wouldn’t count on it though.
MP3Gaze features portable media players from the simplest audio-only 128MB stick to the top-end all-singing, all-dancing video players, as well as headphones, docks and other related accessories. It is updated daily.
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