Brainic’s Vitawave II looks like the Vitawave I and it’s got virtually the same name as the Vitawave I. Normally I write about the product’s name or appearance.
I could actually do this properly and read a press release about the Vitawave II, but unfortunately my pathetic monolinguality means that I can’t comprehend Brainic’s website. So what do I do?
I know. Make the picture bigger: Behold.
I’m feeling slightly upset. I wrote a great - a BRILLIANT - update about how you wore this on your head and how it would make you look like a gimboid. Now I’ve just found another picture with the contraption clasped around a hand. It’s nowhere near big enough to go on your head.
Maybe it’s for animals. Lemurs could wear it on their heads. Eagles could. A good many fish could, although they don’t have ears. Wait, neither do eagles.
Brainic’s Vitawave I has been designed for lemurs.
Looks like an egg. Is called an ‘egge’. ISN’T AN EGG!
Don’t eat the egge!
Don’t break the egge!
Don’t beat the egge!
As a rule of thumb, treat it like your previous MP3 player.
Suggested marketing slogan: “I love Loozy” or “Loozy in the sky with either 512MB or 1GB of storage space”.
This is one of the most average MP3 players on the planet. If you averaged the specifications of all the other MP3 players on the market, it would read as the spec sheet of the Loozy.
Looks a bit like it slides open though. That would be cool. I’m not sure whether it actually does this though, because Brainic’s site’s all written in ‘foreign’ - a language in which I’m anything but fluent.
At last - an MP3 player with a proper name. I give you: Diana.
This is bound to spark a big rush of decent names.
Coming soon:
The Kevin.
The Karl.
The Ian.
The Colin.
The iPoddinator 9000
Why is this Egge a ‘twoway’ and other Brainic Egges aren’t? No idea. Let’s guess - like usual.
It can play music which you can listen to, or you can sing at the Egge and it’ll have to put up with you.
That’s the only suggestion I’ve got. Not sure why the Egge or the Egge Simple won’t let you do that.
I feel like a proper technology journalist today. I’m looking at a website I can’t even read. You know you’re in the land of technology when your PC can’t produce the right characters. Mark my words, no decent technology is made in the West.
So I don’t know who Brainic are and I don’t know about the Egge. It’s 512MB or 1GB. I think it’s 27.4g. It can produce 65,000 colours on a 0.95″ screen.
There’s some educated guessery going on there, as you no doubt understand.
MP3Gaze features portable media players from the simplest audio-only 128MB stick to the top-end all-singing, all-dancing video players, as well as headphones, docks and other related accessories. It is updated daily.
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